Growing.
In the journey of life, there will always be forks in the road - milestones in which the direction of our lives is altered. Specifically in our relationships with others. So hard to move on sometimes, but it is like trimming a tree - it is necessary to promote new growth. I have had the opportunity to experience so much in so little time this year. I’ve experienced some hard times and some amazingly great times but what I have really found is myself. I can be me.
Specifically, I have learned so much about relationships. It is better to be alone than be with someone just to be with someone. That you should never change yourself just to be with someone. That there is a huge difference between compromise and sacrifice in a relationship especially early on - compromise makes relationships work, sacrifice break relationships. When you can find that person with a similar core and interests, that is where happiness in a relationship is.
It is amazing what is possible when you commit yourself to growing as a person and constantly redefining and reinventing yourself. Of course the essence of you - the core values and goals - remains the same, but the way you present yourself to, see, and interact with the world is constantly evolving.
Almost a year ago, I basically shaved my head and my face was clean shaven. Now, I have long hair and facial hair. Why? I do not know really. Just to try something different and I ended up liking it. As an added bonus, the people around me have responded in a surprisingly positive and supportive way to what is a drastic change for someone who is an adult. I don’t want to lose that ability that I had as a teenager to just chase things. To experience things. To be in the moment. To not be scared of looking foolish. To not be scared to laugh at myself when I do idiotic things because when it comes down to it, life is not a spectator sport… you have to get dirty sometimes to get anywhere.
My sister’s wedding is a good example of moving forward. Ten years ago, I would have basically hid in my corner and not talked to anyone. Five years ago, I would have sat and talked to those that I know or people who talked to me first. Present day, I got up in front of a ton of people without a prepared speech and gave the brother of the bride toast. I’ve actually never spoken to a group of people that large before, but it didn’t matter because I spoke from the heart and told my sister how happy I was for her. Why be nervous or scared? Follow your heart and you will find an amazing amount of strength.
There is something amazing about approaching life with an open heart and mind. You get to experience so much more because you do not get wrapped up in guilt or regret. The little things that cause most people to fester quickly cease to matter. Life is really about the people who you choose to spend time with and the experiences you share with them.
I think the best way is to approach life with a smile, laugh, and skip in your step. So what if the world is going to hell in a hand basket? Life is a matter of perspective. If you believe that nothing good will ever happen, it won’t. If you just focus on experiencing life to the fullest and see the good in everything everyday, you will always be content.
Embrace who and where you are and what you love. Grow. Learn. Live.