Archive for January, 2008
January 30, 2008 at 7:19 pm · Filed under Uncategorized
I wrote an amazing post about “Optimism vs. Pessimism” earlier today. Unfortunately my amazing mouse skills caused the browser to go back while I was looking for a quote citation. Trust me, the article was incredibly riveting.
Karma decided to kill it though because I was speaking ill of people who do not even deserve being mentioned. Like my fourth grade teacher. What a bitch. Damn it, now karma is going to spank me again.
Speaking of which, Karma has been in my way all day. I am not quite sure what I have done to upset Senor Karma, but this day was filled with a bunch of tiny irritating things including but not limited to my inability to properly place commas and the contents of my garage bitch slapping my Maxima’s side view mirror. Perhaps deleting most of my MySpace was the cause? Well Mister Karma, none of my former friends wrote me to complain, so I must assume the feelings were mutual.
Perhaps you are just setting me up for some awesomeness. Like I am going to win the Powerball. Yes, I took Engineering Probability and Statistics and I understand playing the lottery is the equivalent of driving a hybrid car to save the environment. Unless, of course, you consider the 482% increase in smugness and superiority complex as being environmentally friendly.
While I am on the subject of cars. Men with large trucks/SUVs, try those penis enhancement pills. I am sure that those will make you feel much better about your tiny penises than driving a big ass vehicle. (Yes, I cited urban dictionary as a credible source).
While I am on the subject of small things - Midgets crack me up. I know that makes me an evil bastard, but midgets are like natures inherently funny clowns - unlike real clowns which are disconcerting to say the least. Hey, children do not like clowns either. When I become supreme ruler of Drewopia, I will have an army comprised completely of midgets and squirrels. It is a combination that cannot be beaten and storing them will not be a problem. I will just get a very large box with holes poked in it and call it a day.
Oh, and Dane Cook is not funny. I was so happy when Keven Costner killed him in Mr. Brooks. On the other hand, Mitch Hedberg was genuinely funny.
Anyways, Senor Karma bring on the awesomeness. Or just smite me some more. Makes things more interesting.
This nonsensical post was sponsored by a neat glass of Macallan 10 year and yo’ momma.
January 28, 2008 at 7:19 pm · Filed under Uncategorized
Please disregard my temporary insanity.
What completely made my day and restored my desire to blog is this: Google search for “shocking abuse of prepositions”. I am #1!
Also, disregard my penchant for deleting posts after the 38 hours it takes to realize how incredibly stupid they are. I am going to attempt to start posting more useful things and leave all the crap for my journal.
Long story short, this weekend was a rather tumultuous one. I had to part with a large amount of junk that has accumulated over my 29 years. I think most of my attachment to my junk is that I have had it for years, so parting with it has sentimental value. Which made me somewhat irrational. In addition to killing my blog, I think I systematically deleted most of my MySpace friends too. Sorry and best of luck to you!
Yes, I parted with my old laptop minus batteries and hard drive. Also tossed around 700 CDs. Mostly burned music and vastly outdated CD-ROMs. I probably could have sold some of them on E-Bay or craigslist since many of them were basically antiques of the early information age.
I am still surrounded by an army of boxes that threatens to crush me if I make a false move. The cleansing process is rather unnerving process for a recovering junkaholic like myself, but a necessary one. I used to think Fung Shui was a giant load of crap, but there is something to it. Then again, I could just be succumbing to the incense fumes or the geriatric dust bunnies.
Anyways, to the point. I have to get rid of at least 25% of my stuff before I will allow myself to buy a fancy DSLR camera. My sister (who minored in photography) offered to teach me, so that should be fun. She is one of those crazy Nikon people who hates Canon, so I was talking into getting a D80, which is a few hundred more than the D40x but is better.
Wow, what a jumbled mess. I have really outdone myself this time. I am not even going to bother editing this. This is pure comedic gold.
Namaste my friends.
January 18, 2008 at 11:12 am · Filed under Uncategorized
I have a healthy respect for squirrels. They are fast and unpredictable. Inside their tiny rodent brains, I know that they are collectively scheming to cause the downfall of western civilization. I can see it in the beady little eyes!
According to some, I actually have an irrational fear of them aka Sciurophobia (Yes, that is actually what it is called). I do not think so. I just do not trust Squirrels! They actually fake burying food when they know they are being watch!.
Fact: Squirrels are highly trained rodent ninja assassins.
Proof:
I am not advocating by any means advocating squirrel genocide. Merely providing anecdotal evidence so that people are wary of the devious nature of these insane creatures!
Do not trust this rodent!
January 16, 2008 at 2:56 pm · Filed under Uncategorized
The best way to make money is to do something you love and get paid for it.
While I am really just an amateur photographer with a point and shoot camera (Canon SD600 - 6 MegaPixel), the internet can provide me with a few additional dollars a month. Shutterstock pays $0.25 per download. 4,000 downloads is enough for a nice DSLR camera. Just need to get some quality lenses and I have a nice little side business.
I just need to figure out all of the settings on my camera for optimal pictures. Photography is one of those hobbies which I would to have more incentive to do and getting paid for taking photos is a good way to do that.
I am excited. Not exactly broke, but more money in this crappy economy is always good especially when it involves something that I have some natural talent for and love of.
My original goal for this blog was to be able to eventually monetize it, but have been posting way too much drivel for that. May spin off a technical blog, hobbyist, or ‘best article of the day’ type of casual thing.
January 4, 2008 at 8:36 pm · Filed under Uncategorized
Saw them on Rolling Stone’s top 50 albums of the year, so had to check them out.
Eastern European Punk Rock complete with Accordion.
Sounds a lot like “Borat does punk rock.”
I have never heard music this hilarious.
